If I could turn back time, I would have stopped myself ever setting foot in that place. I would have told myself it was a bad idea to even go there. That I was looking for trouble. But unfortunately I’m not blessed with a turning back time super skill. And there’s not much I can do about it.
Category Archives: Chifff
… and you can choose which pair of high heels she’ll wear at her big day!
Before reading on, it’s important you’re aware of a certain flaw in my existence. I don’t know what went wrong or when it went wrong. While having my first cry on this planet at birth, bouncing around the playground during childhood or exploring my boundaries as a teenager? It doesn’t matter, at this point we can’t do anything about it. This flaw is irreparable. I’m the lousiest decision maker you’ll ever know…
I’m a very dreamy person. And unfortunately, not always in a good, cheerful kinda way. Last week I dreamt the coolest, most vivid dream about my dearest grandfather, who passed away five years ago. Waking up wasn’t exactly pleasant, as you might guess. I was dreaming about riding on two bikes simultaneously. That alone was quite an adventure, but it turned into a mission impossible because I had to balance a parrot on my shoulder…
All right already. Just cut it out. I’m fed up with it. Enough is enough. A little bit is quite fun. But this is the bloody limit. P-L-E-A-S-E, can someone negotiate with the Weather Emperor and try to convince his Royal Highness to stop the cold, white, slippery mess!?
Last Thursday night I was sound asleep and dreaming about laying on a bounty beach; a delicious raspberry mojito in one hand, a gossip magazine in the other hand, a very handsome lifeguard behind me waving a palm leaf to make sure the heat stayed bearable… I was just about to ask the lifeguard to rub my back with some sun screen when I heard a rustling noise. Like someone was browsing through a pile of magazines, trying to set a world record. I looked around but I couldn’t spot another creature on this bounty beach, besides the lifeguard and me.